


To Boldly Go and Raid Someone Else's Cargo

by Lady_Ganesh



Category: X-Men RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pirate, Alternate Universe - Space, Gen, Humor, Space Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-24
Updated: 2013-12-24
Packaged: 2018-01-05 20:19:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1098193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Ganesh/pseuds/Lady_Ganesh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a far distant future, Ian and Patrick are partners in crime.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Boldly Go and Raid Someone Else's Cargo

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lizzen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lizzen/gifts).



"I've found our next job," Patrick announced.

Hadn't they just finished the last job?

Ian's arm still ached from the fall he'd taken on the bridge of the Warrior IV, a small transport vehicle whose crew had proven unexpectedly fiesty. They were getting too old for this work. Probably past time to retire and take some lovely young things as consorts. "Unless they're shoving the loot at me, I'm inclined to take a pass on this one."

"But they're rogues," Patrick said.

Ian looked over his bushy eyebrows at his partner in crime. "Patrick, dear, so are we."After twenty or so years of raiding the galaxy together, you'd think the man would be clear on that.

"Not like this." Patrick gestured and sent the details to Ian's comm screen.

_Not like this._ Patrick was right. These people were far more than rogues. Rapists, murderers, the kind of people who collected ears or limbs as trophies.

Ian sighed. He hated these ones. Patrick would be sullen for days afterward. But still, even the scum of the galaxy had to have standards. And the takings from these bastards would be all the more pleasurable to profit from.

"Stealing from other pirates," he said, airily. "What will this do to our reputation, Patrick?"

"It can only improve it," Patrick said. "I say we go in from the rear--don't snigger, look at the design of their craft--and overload the rocket boosters. They'll be too busy worrying about the hull breach to think about us."

"You've put quite a bit of thought into this."

Patrick didn't bother denying it. "They were brought to my attention a few months ago," he said. "I did assume we'd cross their paths sooner or later."

That sounded like Patrick. When it was something he was passionate about, he'd start planning five or six steps ahead. Ian wondered who had 'brought' these men to Patrick's attention. He might have to have strong words with them later. "A hull breach," he said thoughtfully, adjusting the image in front of him. "It might work."

"It will work," Patrick said, sending him a flood of data.

"How many times have you gamed this?"

"Did I mention they're carrying gold?"

"You did not," Ian said. Standards were all well and good, but they didn't pay the bills. Gold, on the other hand, had been a useful currency for ten thousand years and counting. They could have their moral satisfaction and a tidy profit. Hard to resist. "How much gold?"

Patrick chuckled, which almost certainly meant he knew he'd won. "A lot, old friend. A lot."

Perhaps it'd be enough for a comfortable retirement. He'd heard the Barton Colony had an excess of handsome young men. Patrick might have to look harder, but it would serve him right for keeping Ian working for so long. Besides, he usually grumbled he'd want to find someone his own age. If that was Patrick's goal, he'd have no trouble at all. He was still absurdly handsome, and that voice of his would charm the knickers off anyone in range. "I don't see any information on their crew," Ian said.

Patrick smiled, the smile that was often the last one his opponents saw. "The friend who tipped me off inflicted no little damage in their last encounter," he said. "And as far as I can tell, they've added no one to their ranks since. Men like them don't find as many bedfellows at they used to, and it takes more work."

"Perhaps they're growing afraid of you."

Patrick laughed. "Me? Have you forgotten how many soldiers you've gutted in your day? And that's to say nothing of your skill with a laser pistol."

"The laser pistol is a weapon of last resort." It lacked elegance, and the smell was terrible. A sword was still his favorite weapon, as old-fashioned as it was. You never breached your hull accidentally with a sword, though he'd had a few close calls with spacesuits. It wasn't like you couldn't rip your spacesuit open with a laser pistol as well.

"At any rate, I'd say if they're afraid of anyone, it's...well, it's likely both of us, at any rate."

"That I can live with," Ian granted, and leaned back in his chair. A ship full of gold with a crew no one would miss. It would be fun. Perhaps he wasn't quite ready to retire yet, after all. There was always the chance of picking up a new crew member in the Barton Colony instead....

He heard Patrick chuckle as he set the coordinates. "The game is on," he said, with relish.

Ian just grinned.


End file.
